An insight on "my relationship" ?

                Of course I couldn’t create a blog about love and relationships and so forth without giving a little insight on my own. We all had our fair share of assholes, jerks, and all around “just no good men” in our lives.  And yes, I have had my fair share of all of the above. My “relationship” was not technically what I called a “relationship” but it is what it is, or shall I say it was what it was. I had to call it quits when I got fed up with the felling “in it by myself” feeling, this was problem number 1. I had met the “boy” “I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with” (HA) back in grade school. We were on and off for about 3-4 years before getting “serious” around April of 2012. And don’t get me wrong, I did love him, and he never let me forget he loved me, and that I was “the one”.  But I just couldn’t deal with the basic anymore when I knew I deserved much more. When I say I felt like I was in this “relationship” alone, it’s pretty much because I was. I was the only one traveling to spend time with the other, spending money going back and forth, (never really going nowhere but to “his house”). I felt like I was tied into a big lie that I couldn’t untangle.  It was a lot of pressure in that “relationship” but not for intercourse. That’s one good thing that I can say about that “relationship”, I was never pressured into having sex. Once I moved on to go to college, nothing really changed except the fact that we weren’t seeing each other every weekend. We would talk and text from time to time, but nothing consistent that would give somebody the impression that I was with someone. That was problem number 2. “He” would go days sometimes weeks without talking to me. Should I have had felt like I was in a relationship? Hell no. How could you not talk to the person your supposedly be with on a regular basis? That should come like second-hand nature or something right? But like I said, it was what it was. After going through normal trials and tribulations in a “relationship” and the little break he decided to take, I called it quits in February of 2013. When I came home during spring break in March, of course we were still talking and seeing each other, which was a big ass mistake. The first time I broke up with “him” I felt depressed and decided to give it another try only to end it once I got back to school. At that time, I was “talking” to someone else. Once I got home in May for summer break, I decided to go see “him” one last time to see if it was really worth it, and it wasn’t. They always say never go looking for something somewhere you shouldn’t, and that’s exactly what “he” did. When I was talking to that someone else, that someone asked me to spend the night, he saw it and got upset, which was his fault and started calling me everything he could, we weren’t even together. All I did was laugh, what else could I do. Once things were over and done with, I went home to never ever hear from “him” again. Sometimes I sit and think about that “relationship” and ask myself “was it really all that bad?” Considering all the things above, I say yes and no. Yes because I do want to move on and be with someone on the same level as I am which he was not. Looking at it all now, I can’t say things would have changed for the better and that they would have probably stayed the same. I believe he didn’t respect me the way he should have considering the fact that he “loved me so much”.  I say no because half of me really believed he loved me, he might not have had showed it as much as he should have, but I definitely felt he truly did. No also because I still wonder would things have ever changed, and did I leave too soon to figure out since we were just getting serious. No relationship is perfect, no one’s ever will be, but should we stick in there a little longer just to see all the possible possibilities? Or leave while we can?